Beautiful Mommy

Today, I was shopping for some groceries when three young and beautiful college-aged girls came into the store – we almost collided because they came in the exit door as I was pushing my kiddo/cart out – but I couldn’t help but stop and stare for a half second. They were just so pretty! So put together. One blonde was wearing a bright pink lip color. Another brunette was flashing a dazzling white smile.

I smiled, said “‘Scuse us,” and continued on my merry way.

I thought three consecutive things:

1. Ahhh, the good ole days of having time for makeup and caring about looking cute for class and errands.
2. Maybe I should try a little more… I mean I have a two year old. He can give me 5 minutes of quiet to do a little more beauty work.
3. NAAAHHHHH.

I look back fondly on my “cute” college and grad school days. I recall with delight first meeting my now-husband and flirting! But reliving those days? Of body insecurity? Of wondering (and saying you don’t care but caring) what so-and-so meant when she gave you that back-handed compliment on your hair?

No thanks!

Aging is a gift that is denied to many. Appreciating the aging process is a gift denied to MOST. I love it! I love each new stage of my life, each new day with my body and “my looks” (which are slowly expanding… 23 weeks pregnant). I love being an old soul. I love being 29 but not knowing if someone is 15 or 20 because they “all” look. so. young. Haha, I know – it’s ridiculous! But I’m turning 30 in July, and I’m kind of stoked about it.

My best friend, who happens to be single, said “Yes, but that’s because you’re married. Turning 30 is a little more jolting when you’re alone!”

She’s probably right, to a large extent. But I’d argue that it depends on your spouse! Some husbands/wives may also be a little jolted when they wake up with a 30, 40, or 50-year-old wife/husband next to them – cue possible mid-life crisis (for either party)!

In this case, she’s right. I’ve been blessed with a man who thinks pregnant is sexy; loves that I’m always going to be his hot, young wife (I’m 4 years younger than he); and talks regularly about our retirement plans – i.e. he knows he wants to have lots of kids and enjoy that time but also is ready to run away with me after it’s all said and done. Alone again! 😉 Not to mention he doesn’t care if I wear makeup. He appreciates my “natural beauty”! I’m very blessed.

Of course I didn’t say this to my single friend. Just sent silly emojis in return 🙂

There was no envy of those pretty young co-eds today. Just a sigh of relief. A feeling of gratitude. I love getting dolled up like anyone else might, especially for a nice night out or fun event with friends… But in my day-to-day, I’m ok being a beautiful mommy. A beautiful mommy with no make up. A beautiful mommy who had her two year old resting his head on her belly while waiting in a ridiculously long supermarket line. A beautiful mommy that tries to get laundry folded while dancing to Sesame Street YouTube videos.

In my definition of beauty:
Instead of picking up a new eyeliner, which I use once a month maybe, I buy more Pampers for my boy. Instead of getting that cute new top, I wear what I have and top it off with a necklace I haven’t worn in a year. Rather than learn new makeup techniques, I’ve learned to pare down my makeup bag. Powder, blush, mascara, Chapstick.

My heart is full. My goal is heaven – not earthly beauty/success. So why not love yourself, in any state, the way Jesus loves you? Purely, deeply, eternally, unequivocally.

Time is precious. Aging is beautiful. Whatever you do or don’t do, just love yourself (dressed up or down) in this moment.
Every moment.

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